Brain Sediment

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October 16th, 2:15 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

French Trump eez here!

Reporter: Your teenaged son Barron tested positive for COVID-19. Was he around other people while he was contagious?
French Trump: I’m fine.

Tune into his Weekly Press Conference now! paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get those leetle pods!
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French Trump eez here! 

Reporter: Your teenaged son Barron tested positive for COVID-19. Was he around other people while he was contagious?
French Trump:  I’m fine.

Tune into his Weekly Press Conference now! paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get those leetle pods!Image attachment

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But not bottled water - toilet water.

I'm surprised he even knows that boy's name.

I love French Trump!

Asswipe

I love French Trump, too!

They are all naturally contagious and evil.

When you retweet something you own it! 

He recently referred to him as Melania’s son. Maybe he’s not the father.

Donald named him Barren, after his own soul... (Yes, I know it's spelled differently, relax Karon, it's a joke)

I've been saying that Donald Trump is like Typhoid Mary since day one, only he's Covid Donald. He's a carrier, spreading his germs. It's why so many around him are so....so.... infected. There is something not quite right with people just willingly letting themselves get infected like that. Who volunteers to get sick? It's like some fashionable form of reverse Munchhausen's...They want to get sick?

So sad. I wish Barron nothing but the best. He's a kid after all.

Paula, keep you ignorant OPINIONS to yourself. You still are not funny.

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October 15th, 11:01 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Nobody Asked You! is here.... Get your weekly dose of laughs! ... See MoreSee Less

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Hi Paula, I love your stuff and wanted to donate a few bucks via PayPal. Didn't worked. My account is in Germany. What shall I do?

Regarding Kari's cat C.C., especially since she can't remember what it originally stood for, shouldn't it now stand for "Captain Crinkle"?

What?

October 13th, 7:42 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

What is “true grit?” What’s false grit? What’s grit, and how do you help your kids get some (without Photoshopping them onto a horse)? Author Paul Tough (yes, real name!) comes by to grit us up. Also — your show descriptions! And an uncomfortable amount of talk about lubricants. Thanks to house band Timm Freeman!
Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you listen to your pods.
... See MoreSee Less

What is “true grit?” What’s false grit? What’s grit, and how do you help your kids get some (without Photoshopping them onto a horse)? Author Paul Tough (yes, real name!) comes by to grit us up. Also — your show descriptions! And an uncomfortable amount of talk about lubricants. Thanks to house band Timm Freeman! 
Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you listen to your pods.

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Love this, and love you! 🙂

I think grit is that crust in your underwear after you have been on the trails few days.

...and there you are, Paula, GRITting your teeth in that photo.

That shit you put under your bathtub right?

I listen while delivering and I had to pull over because of the laugh induced tears. Or maybe it was just all the lubrication in my eyes.

I like grits with plenty of butter and pepper.

I miss Winnie Rose And Cher Eva! 😂😂😂

I seriously love this podcast! It makes my drive to and from work so much more enjoyable!

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October 12th, 1:19 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Is anyone else often confused about what day, season, month, or time it is? ... See MoreSee Less

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Or what to do next… Because it probably won’t count next week?

Yes!

Yes!

I have to tell you Paula... I saw you a number of times in Ithaca Ny. You made me lol so hard! I so miss that!!

I'm sorry. And you are...?

Totally...

It's Thanksgiving, isn't it?

Um...it's...um....wait, wait, don't tell me...um.......well shit. I give up.

What. . .what do those words actually *mean*?

Yes, now who are you?

Daily.

Do I know you?

Does anybody really know what month it is? Does anybody really care?

Yes...apparently it's a "holiday weekend".

I was, but now Autumn has arrived today here in Maine, and my walk to the car told me so.

Juvember 42nd?

I ask Alexa. And then I ask again because I forgot to listen the first time.

Solid on it being 2020. Everything else...🤷🏼‍♀️

I think so 😓

Every freakin day.

Me. I got lost in a Covid time-warp a while ago and still haven’t found my way out.

Frequently.

It's Blursday.

Never had the luxury, no. At no age that I remember.

✋🙋

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October 9th, 2:15 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Reporter: Are you sure that you are well enough to be giving a press conference?

French Trump: I am on Regenerdon. I am cured of the virus. I feel fantastic, sharp as a tack.

Reporter: We’re over here, Sir, behind you. Turn around. You’re facing the wall.

French Trump's Weekly Press Conference is live at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get your pods!
... See MoreSee Less

Reporter: Are you sure that you are well enough to be giving a press conference?  

French Trump: I am on Regenerdon. I am cured of the virus. I feel fantastic, sharp as a tack.

Reporter: We’re over here, Sir, behind you. Turn around. You’re facing the wall.

French Trumps Weekly Press Conference is live at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get your pods!

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Did you notice since the debate Trump stopped calling Biden "sleepy Joe?"

I need ALL the laughs to get through to Nov 3. Thank you, Paula. LOL

Tarp as a shack he is.

WORD....

Little disconcerting hearing the late Gwen Ifill ask French Trump questions.

I love French Trump

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October 8th, 11:17 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

This one is a real nail biter! Friends since Kindergarten, Erika and Kristina square off in this week's NOBODY ASKED YOU! Starring Paula Poundstone! Watch below or at paulapoundstone.com/rx-laughter-videos/ ... See MoreSee Less

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YEA PAULA. 😊

thanks for being there with your positive attitude and wonderful playfulness.

Love this. Has Paula loss weight?? I think yes.

Holy shit Amy, this is so cool! You did great and you look so stinking cute! We love us some Paula Poundstone!

Paula, you just made my night, I really needed these laughs. Thank you!

Gosh am I going to have to get a Paula Poundstone tattoo now? 😉

Don't get a tatoo. You might dump me in a few years.

I know, now that tattoo is spelled tattoo.

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October 6th, 6:41 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Is your luck running out? I mean, literally running out your door? Feng Shui expert and architect Anjie Cho comes by to instruct Paula and Adam how to better align their furniture and litter boxes and improve their lives. Also, listener Shannon Polly won the right to appear on our show in a charity auction - and we interview her to replace our poor, deceased intern Doug! And... NoseFridas. Are they even a thing? Thanks to house band Aedan MacDonnell! Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get your podcasts. ... See MoreSee Less

Is your luck running out? I mean, literally running out your door? Feng Shui expert and architect Anjie Cho comes by to instruct Paula and Adam how to better align their furniture and litter boxes and improve their lives. Also, listener Shannon Polly won the right to appear on our show in a charity auction - and we interview her to replace our poor, deceased intern Doug! And... NoseFridas. Are they even a thing? Thanks to house band Aedan MacDonnell! Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

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This was a great show! Thanks Paula

I do

Bonnie and the NoseFrida 😂😂😂😂

Love you Paula Poundstone

Paula, your number of cats seems to be decreasing. Death? Moved?

Maybe to improve your fung shui (and the smell of your living quarters) you might consider a “catio”. A catio is an enclosed patio for cats. It allows a cat to get some fresh air, view nature, and sun themselves without escaping. My sister had one built in her new house. The cats enter via a cat door installed in a window. She can even lock them out there when they get underfoot. The cats love it and spend much of their day outside. You can also put your cat boxes out there too and get them and their smell out of your house.

Well actually we do listen.

Paula reminds me alot of my uncle Paul A. who doesn't exist.

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October 5th, 1:13 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

These are large font days for the CNN website. ... See MoreSee Less

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Is it in "Apologia Light"?

Not only were the headlines big, but most of the headlines just said “AAAAAARGH!”. Captures the nation’s mood.

Good for their older demographic to read by...;-)

WORD.....

Never have seen these font sizes on Politico before either!

And I’m hoping that on November 4th, they read, “YOU’RE FIRED!”

Is that what they use for "fake news"?

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October 4th, 9:16 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

So, the office doesn't make the man. ... See MoreSee Less

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Unless you're Ricky Gervais.

Obviously.

As Michelle Obama famously noted, "Being president doesn't change who you are, it reveals who you are."

Apparently neither does the ill-fitting suit.

Or the excessively long tie.

Or the weird hair piece with a life of its own.

Or a trophy wife...oh wait, 3 trophy wives. 2 of whom are immigrants. Or a porn star. Or a playboy model..... just sayin’

Remember the hopeful folks who thought becoming the President would suddenly transform tRump into a decent human being?

The office reveals the man.

exactly.

It never did. There needs to be a much higher bar set to sit in that office.

Anxiously awaiting the inevitable hair loss that the virus causes.

A person might not need experience to hold that office; but at least please know how to be a decent human being beforehand.

He’s never BEEN a REAL man

Michelle Obama said that it reveals the man.

In case you're interested. Sudbury cops are following his "leadership" and refusing to mandate masks for officers conducting traffic stops claiming safety issues even while our State Police have a mask mandate as do departments around MA. www.change.org/RequireFaceMasksForSudburyPolice

Well ... it didn't say it made a *good* man, did it.

now you tell us

It Reveals the JERK!

Neither does the disease. Man is on his own...

If only we had known.

Uh, no.

Or the $70,000 haircut

Neither does the microphone 🎤

Crisis reveals character.

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October 2nd, 2:31 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

French Trump is up! Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get those pods of yours! ... See MoreSee Less

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Bravo! 🎉 Très bien fait, Monsieur le Président! Mais je crois qu’il faut être un peu plus poli la prochaine fois sauf si vous ne quittez pas l’hôpital Walter Reed! Oh là là! Quel horreur! 😜 Bisous, Mademoiselle Poundstone. 😘

October 1st, 7:40 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

I'm glad I didn't watch that debate in a bed. You'd never get that memory out of memory foam. ... See MoreSee Less

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I only made it through about 15 minutes. What. A. Mess. Besides, I am sure there was a litter box or two for you to sift... definitely a better use of your time. 😆

Nah. It would be repressed, but that would probably give you the worst back pain ever. :\

🤣

You'd have to burn it!

One day my grandkids will say to me “Grandpapa, were you there to watch that famous debate between Joe Biden and Donald Trump?” And I’ll just start blubbering until given a sedative.

Looking forward to French Trump’s press conference.

It made me reach for the Gouda

Glad I didn't watch. 90 minutes I don't have to wish I had back. Bonded with Hepzibah, Phoebe and Clifford instead...

Jokes like these are why I love you! Silly is far and away the best humor.

I can't stop LOLing🐿

🤣Hard to call that trainwreck a debate...

Bleach, hydrochloride & a spritz of Lysol works like magic. Great for MyPillow too!

I'm real tired of some of these trumpsters comparing the two in any way....like,...didn't you see it?.......and you're still lying to cover for this piece of crap?

I could only watch via Colbert and some clips and a large dose of humor. I have a feeling even the COVID virus won't want to stick around too long and he will be just fine.

The magic of YouTube allowed me to forgo watching the debate. Oh, I could go back and watch the whole thing but I love myself too much for that.

I had to toggle between it and The Big Bang Theory. So painful. When it was mercifully over I watched msnbc's review. The 3 anchors looked shell shocked...they had to watch the whole thing.

You're the best Paula!

My wife and I were yelling at the TV. Had to walk out of room 3 times. Wine was consumed.

i think the candidate' heads are filled with memory foam.

Winner winner chicken dinner! 😆

I watched the entire thing!! It never got any better!!!!

Thankfully Joe followed social distancing!

be sleeping on the floor!

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October 1st, 10:10 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Sisters, sisters...There were never such devoted sisters! This week on NOBODY ASKED YOU! Meredith will face-off against older sister Martha. Not a thing could come between them... except maybe a bow. Watch now below or at youtu.be/R2zYYtEToxE. ... See MoreSee Less

September 30th, 4:19 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Johnson & Johnson may or may not come up with a safe, effective vaccine, but their new Q-Tips will be cutting edge. ... See MoreSee Less

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HHMMMM...qtips.....

Ouch!

Bonnie - don’t put them in your ears!!! 👂

Ouch !

Hopefully, it won’t involve any application of baby powder!

Ouch!

And I assume the toxic element in their talcum powder has been modified!

johnson & johnson has been poisoning women & babies for years. do not buy

Q-tips are the devil's cotton candy.

Q-tips are for belly buttons! Good advice from a doctor after my friend punctured her eardrum. 😉

Gee, I don’t get the point...buddaboomching!

I heard that Helen Reddy died and I immediately thought of the Helen Reddy killer. I'm 46 and still remember that bit. Lol

Seems a bad idea for something you use to put on eye shadow because two days after you opened it you lost the tiny tiny brush that came with it. As if we need eye shadow now.

I thought Cutting Edge was the new album by Q-Tip...boy is my face red.

Yes, and their baby powder has gotten them tremendous credibility.

DON'T USE THEM IN YOUR EARS! Don't know where else to use them....maybe bellybutton...just don't know 🤔

We 🥰 our Q-Tips!

And there talcum powder is the best! 😳

The Q-Anon Tip (you're welcome)

My daughter's best friend's mother is a doctor at Johnson & Johnson. They took her off of prostate cancer research to work on the vaccine. Obviously Johnson & Johnson cares about things other than men's Johnsons!

Cures the virus but gives you ovarian cancer.

My doctor told me to stop putting sharp things in my ears..

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September 29th, 8:12 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

I wish Jackie Gleason was alive to play Trump in the movie. ... See MoreSee Less

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🤚🤚🤚

vote Biden!

He would NEVER do it.

Trump is a fool and disgrace

to the moon, Melenia, to the moon!

"You sumbitch" 😂

How about Randy Quaid instead?

“And awaaaay he’ll go!”

Trump is disgraceful.

Jackie Gleeson? I might have passed this anvil off to Carroll O'Conner. "Stifle myself, Donny!"

OMG, right???

It’s a hard casting decision since he has hair and skin color that don’t occur in nature.

I wish Benny Hill was alive to play Biden in the movie.

Well, Trump has BLABBERMOUTH covered on his own, so he wouldn’t need to utter that one.

Rodney Dangerfield would be a closer match physically.

Or Ernest Borgnine.

The LAST thing this country needs is a movie about Agent Orange. We need him to go away!

What did Jackie Gleason ever do to you?🤬

Truly inspired casting.

At his most bellicose, I don't think Jackie could act that way.

Caroll O’Connor. Except Archie had redeeming qualities deep down.

Haaa!

One of these days, Alice.

My dad literally used to party with him.......I'm not making this up......

We have Brendan Gleesen instead 🤪 youtu.be/fzGyavwB-Ho

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September 29th, 6:53 am

PAULA POUNDSTONE

That whole “right brain/left brain” thing — is that a thing? Neuroscientist Dr. Christof Koch is on hand to answer that and help us unravel other secrets of our brains. Plus, another Mailbag(!), and Bonnie “Captain Crinkle” Burns reveals a previously unknown chapter of her life: “Walking With Cher.” Thanks to house band Kevin Kelso! Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get those pods of yours! ... See MoreSee Less

That whole “right brain/left brain” thing — is that a thing? Neuroscientist Dr. Christof Koch is on hand to answer that and help us unravel other secrets of our brains. Plus, another Mailbag(!), and Bonnie “Captain Crinkle” Burns reveals a previously unknown chapter of her life: “Walking With Cher.” Thanks to house band Kevin Kelso! Listen at paulapoundstone.com or wherever you get those pods of yours!

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Juan C. FernandezJUAN

September 28th, 9:29 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

Don't cut him in half. ... See MoreSee Less

Dont cut him in half.

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But if he does then he can expand his bubble to a second location! 👍🏼

Humph. The important thing is that I don’t see Thomas Coyne in that yard. Another place to check off the list!

Both are such great entertainers and thoughtful human beings. If you are ever in Las Vegas (once life is normal again) catching their show if a MUST.

Protect This Wholesome Content

It’s good to find your bubble people.

I used to have a few bubble people...but I haven’t heard from them. Either the wind got em..or they got popped.

Read Penn's book about his weight loss. Very interesting.

Awesome! Thanks for sharing this!

how did you get so skinny? And so old? The last time I saw you guys was in LA at the CSICOP convention and you were like 30.

Loved Teller as Amy’s dad on TBB

Being apart that long - I'll bet Teller had a lot to say

Seems like a good place to suggest a new Word of the Week. Hemicorporectomy. Something that Paula, Penn and Teller might all enjoy.

Great to see this. 'Best of luck guys.

And don't drown him!

My friend and I saw this duo while visiting an art museum in SF. He pointed them out to me—and they are very hard to miss because of physique. 🖼 Later, my friend said he was joking, and it was just two guys. But I’m sure it was P & T!

I love Penn Jillette. He’s a big reason I list ethical atheism as a legitimate religion every time I get into a theological argument, which is often.

I have really enjoy your show for the last few seasons and your deft way to infer on tricks while admiring the abilities and skills of your guests. Great Show! keep up the fun and games, I love it.

Looks like they have a plate spinning set up behind them. I haven't seen plate spinning since the 70's. I'm so old.

Looks like Penn already got cut in half. He's literally half the man he used to be! Most of us GAIN weight on lockdown, LOL!

Love the shows!

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September 27th, 4:06 pm

PAULA POUNDSTONE

My goofy little game show, NOBODY ASKED YOU: Starring Paula Poundstone, is up, so Vlad can see it. ... See MoreSee Less

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Your have been my hero since you did 2 sets in a row in kansas years ago. Comedian Hall of Fame!!!

Your crafting, delivery, and art is excellent. 👍

It's the crowd work. She's a genius..

I save your stuff to watch, and it gets me through the pandemic, the political scene right not, the Almeda fire, and everything else. Thank you. I am from Chicopee, raised our 2 sons in Sudbury, then moved to the west Coast to be closer to them. They came out at different times to go to graduate school in the bay area. Love you.

Up where?

Is there any chance that the Poundstone Diner Cam will come back?

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